I'm taking Geology 101 this semester. The material itself is enough to make it my favorite class. I'm in love with rocks and volcanoes and just Earth in general. Period. [: But on top of that, my teacher is simply hilarious. Every lecture is solid stand-up comedy. He is the best professor I've ever had. This guy can get 100+ students totally psyched about what most people think of as boring lumps of dirt.
Some of the things he says are just too good to let go by, so I write them down in the margins of my notes. Here are some of the best ones so far:
Explaining how nothing can really get in the way of lava:
"Lava plus trees equals lava. Lava plus houses equals lava. Lava plus you equals lava. The basic point here, class, is that lava plus anything else equals lava, unless the 'anything else'... is Chuck Norris."
“The Earth is hollow. How many of you knew that? The opening is somewhere around the North Pole. But no one’s found it yet. Why? The government is hiding it. It’s a government conspiracy. Because they all know that if we found the opening to hollow Earth, we’d all want to go live in the hollow Earth. Yeah. No sales tax down there...”
Talking about earthquakes:
"There are quite a few things that make the earth shake - faults, dinosaurs, and: my mother-in-law."
While showing us a government-produced list of three things you should do if an earthquake occurs:
“I love this number three - 'If in a moving vehicle, stop as soon as possible.' NO WAY. If I’m driving down I-15 and there’s a 7.0, I am puttin’ it to the floor! How many chances like that do you get? That’s the closest you’ll ever get to flying a TIE fighter in your life.”
Okay, tell me honestly, why would you NOT take a class from this guy? Look at him. He is the epitome of awesome! Geology is the epitome of awesome! [: Oh dang my life is good.
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