Balancing all the parts of college life is hard. There are new responsibilities. New things to worry about. New things to take care of. New things to think about. Am I doing this right? Am I going in the right direction? Finding my major. Grades that really matter. Friends. Remembering to feed myself. Keeping my room somewhat organized. Laundry. Grocery shopping. Budgeting. Sleeping enough. Visiting teaching. Exercise. Boys.
The future. And as a result of all these wonderful things, I get to come home every night at eleven o'clock and fall into bed dog-tired, emotionally wrung out, physically exhausted and sore, and mentally overloaded. Lately it's been almost more than I can take. Seven classes, a church calling, making time for just me and personal study, still maintaining a social life, weight lifting twice a week and running every day. These days I'm being stressed harder than I've ever been. I can confidently say I've learned two things - First, that I can't do this without help from people who know more than me and are more experienced than me {TA's, friends, my parents}, nor without the strength and guidance lent to me by a higher power. And second, I have so, so much to learn, so much to improve about myself, and so far to go until I've become who I'm supposed to be. I have been blessed with so many second chances and growing experiences. My life is sometimes a little rough, but my life is also very good. I have so much, but a few things in particular have been on my mind lately.
I get to go to Brigham Young University, where church leaders and apostles come speak to us. Where I go to class in dedicated buildings. Where there's crazy good clean fun going on every night. Where the Cougar Fight Song becomes engrained in one's brain. Where I get to learn by the intelligence of man and by the Spirit. Where I'm three minutes from a temple. Where I get to serve my friends and serve strangers. Where I learn lessons that will remain with me for the rest of my life. I get to learn how to be the best me, the person my Heavenly Father needs me to become. This can definitely happen at any university, but little by little I'm growing to know this is where it's supposed to happen for
me in particular. And that's a really nice assurance to have.
I get to live with five other beautiful, wonderful girls who make my life easier, funnier, simpler, and fuller. I get to have friends who care about me and know me. We can talk about everything and anything till 3am. I get to have multiple full-blown, can't-catch-your-breath, laughing-so-hard-that-nothing-comes-out belly laughs a day because of them. I get to have friends who make it easier to live the gospel and easier to be a better person. Friends here, plus friends who are all over the world serving the Lord and bringing people to Him, friends who share their testimonies with me and help mine to grow. Friends who teach me through their example and words.
I get to have a body that is adaptable and strong and capable of doing hard things. My body is my friend, and I'm starting to realize that more and more. Even when I only give it four hours of sleep and a snarfed-down bowl of hot cereal for the entire day, it keeps going with me, without protest. Even when I work it hard and make it hurt, it rebounds and regrows and becomes stronger. And not only does it let me do, but it enables me to
learn. It lets me become more aware of this world, the people in it, the current events, the movements, the philosophies, the sciences, the possibilities of it. It lets me analyze and organize and apply. It lets me grow. It houses my mind, and my spirit. It is such a
blessing to have a body.
Sometimes my life is kinda rough. Kinda stressful. Kinda sleep-deprived. Kinda frustrating too. But I have so much. I have the eternal perspective that the gospel brings. I have a firm foundation. I have potential. I have life. I have
my life. And my life is so good. It is so, so good.
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| Utah sunsets. Makes a girl happy to be alive [: |
